Is It Contagious (You Diseased Mutt)?
It was the summer after my senior year of high school. I was sitting around a table with a bunch of former classmates and their parents. I had just been diagnosed with Grave's Disease. Now I know this blog is about my diabetes but I'll make the connection I promise. Anyways, we were sitting there and I was talking about my new diagnosis and my ex (if you went to HS with me you know who I am talking about, he still doesn't know) says "Is it contagious?" There was an uproar of laughter from everyone sitting there. His father. My former friends. And their parents.
This moment is VIVID in my memories. I can picture it like it was yesterday. I can tell you who's house we were at. I can tell you what city I was in. I remember it well. You want to know why? I have the trifecta of autoimmune disorders. (I told you I would bring it back to diabetes). I don't think he would ever admit it but I am confident that I was too diseased. Too imperfect. Too sick for his perfect life. We were incompatible. That's where he had said goodbye before senior prom.
I always was concerned about what my significant other thought about my diabetes. Or any of my other diseases. I constantly thought about what others were thinking about me when I ate the 2nd piece of cake at a party in high school. (yes I can have my cake and eat it too) I can still tell you the name of the guy and the look he gave me as I grabbed seconds. Was it because I was "different?" Was it because I was diabetic?
The reality is these people probably still to this day have NO clue how they impacted me. They have NO idea how the question of whether it was contagious has stuck with me for SO long! You know what though? I'm not contagious. Not even a little bit. My body "dislikes" me. It decided that it didn't like my beta cells so now I am diabetic. It decided that my thyroid wasn't going to work for it so I was diagnosed with Grave's disease. It decided that my intestines weren't going to like the American staple, wheat. So I was diagnosed with Celiac disease. I have hit the trifecta and to be honest. I've got another coming down the pipeline that I refuse to get diagnosed because I will become more "diseased."
I will say that there is one amazing human in this world and that is my husband. He treated me like a queen from the beginning. When he made me a gluten free picnic on our second date, I knew I would marry him. He has wanted to be a dad since as long as I have known him and he knew my pregnancy would not be easy or without risk and he chose to get down on his knee to ask me to marry him. He has loved every disease I have conquered. He has supported all of me. He has embraced my diseases so much so that he eats gluten free (sometimes).
No, I'm not contagious. Yes, my children have a chance to live a perfectly healthy life. Yes, we are going to continue to create beautiful children even with the chance they may develop something in my or my husbands genes. Because ultimately God knew what he was doing when he blessed me with the trifecta. He knew it would make me a more empathetic nurse. He knew it would make me understand that I can't be so quick to judge. He knew that I could handle living life on the side of a mountain because he also blessed me with the most amazing belayers.
This moment is VIVID in my memories. I can picture it like it was yesterday. I can tell you who's house we were at. I can tell you what city I was in. I remember it well. You want to know why? I have the trifecta of autoimmune disorders. (I told you I would bring it back to diabetes). I don't think he would ever admit it but I am confident that I was too diseased. Too imperfect. Too sick for his perfect life. We were incompatible. That's where he had said goodbye before senior prom.
I always was concerned about what my significant other thought about my diabetes. Or any of my other diseases. I constantly thought about what others were thinking about me when I ate the 2nd piece of cake at a party in high school. (yes I can have my cake and eat it too) I can still tell you the name of the guy and the look he gave me as I grabbed seconds. Was it because I was "different?" Was it because I was diabetic?
The reality is these people probably still to this day have NO clue how they impacted me. They have NO idea how the question of whether it was contagious has stuck with me for SO long! You know what though? I'm not contagious. Not even a little bit. My body "dislikes" me. It decided that it didn't like my beta cells so now I am diabetic. It decided that my thyroid wasn't going to work for it so I was diagnosed with Grave's disease. It decided that my intestines weren't going to like the American staple, wheat. So I was diagnosed with Celiac disease. I have hit the trifecta and to be honest. I've got another coming down the pipeline that I refuse to get diagnosed because I will become more "diseased."
I will say that there is one amazing human in this world and that is my husband. He treated me like a queen from the beginning. When he made me a gluten free picnic on our second date, I knew I would marry him. He has wanted to be a dad since as long as I have known him and he knew my pregnancy would not be easy or without risk and he chose to get down on his knee to ask me to marry him. He has loved every disease I have conquered. He has supported all of me. He has embraced my diseases so much so that he eats gluten free (sometimes).
No, I'm not contagious. Yes, my children have a chance to live a perfectly healthy life. Yes, we are going to continue to create beautiful children even with the chance they may develop something in my or my husbands genes. Because ultimately God knew what he was doing when he blessed me with the trifecta. He knew it would make me a more empathetic nurse. He knew it would make me understand that I can't be so quick to judge. He knew that I could handle living life on the side of a mountain because he also blessed me with the most amazing belayers.
my first inclination is to ask if you're standing like Wonder Woman as you wrote the end of this!?? =) <3
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